14 days until Halloween!

How to drink pumpkin spice latte properly. Step 1: Be a black cat. We discovered this wonderful illustration by Ryan Conners on Instagram this morning. It has all the Halloween vibez going.

Ryan is a very talented artist and photographer based in Pennsylvania, she is self-taught and loves cats. We have thoroughly enjoyed her Halloween and Day of the Dead art. Visit her Kilkenny Cat blog and prepare to be amazed!


15 days until Halloween!

Only a couple of weeks now! We hope the tea will be ghoulishly good. As a blast from the past, we have a video of Clovis having Halloween tea at La Rosa Hotel in Whitby last year.

29 days until Halloween!

We are excited, truly excited. The kettle is dancing with the best tea on the planet. And we are drinking away, enjoying the moment. In 29 days, we’ll go trick-or-treating and we’ll have the best time of our lives!

Today, our chosen film is Tim Burton’s “The Nightmare Before Christmas”, and we love the opening song, “This is Halloween”. We’re sharing the video here so that you can sing and dance with us.


Boys and girls of every age
Wouldn’t you like to see something strange?
Come with us and you will see
This, our town of Halloween

This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Pumpkins scream in the dead of night
This is Halloween, everybody make a scene
Trick or treat until the neighbours going to die of fright
It’s our town, everybody scream
In this town of Halloween

I am the one hiding under your bed
Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red
I am the one hiding under your stairs
Fingers like snakes and spiders in my hair

This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Halloween, Halloween, Halloween, Halloween

In this town, we call home
Everyone hail to the pumpkin song
In this town, don’t we love it now?
Everybody’s waiting for the next surprise

Round that corner, man hiding in the trash can

Something’s waiting now to pounce and how you’ll scream
This is Halloween, red and black, slimy green
Aren’t you scared? Well, that’s just fine

Say it once, say it twice
Take a chance and roll the dice
Ride with the moon in the dead of night
Everybody scream, everybody scream
In our town of Halloween

I am the clown with the tear-away face
Here in a flash and gone without a trace
I am the who when you call, who’s there?
I am the wind blowing through your hair
I am the shadow on the moon at night
Filling your dreams to the brim with fright

This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Halloween, Halloween, Halloween, Halloween
Halloween, Halloween

Tender lumplings everywhere
Life’s no fun without a good scare
That’s our job, but we’re not mean
In our town of Halloween

In this town, don’t we love it now?
Everybody’s waiting for the next surprise

Skeleton Jack might catch you in the back
And scream like a banshee
Make you jump out of your skin
This is Halloween, everybody scream
Won’t you please make way for a very special guy?

Our man Jack is king of the Pumpkin patch
Everyone hail to the Pumpkin King, now

This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Halloween, Halloween, Halloween, Halloween

In this town, we call home
Everyone hail to the pumpkin song

La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la

A ray of sunshine with built-in sunblock, Real Gothic FC’s dazzling victory

All we ever wanted… was everything

Well, it did not come home this time, but never fear. We are about to tell you a true football success story. Something that will completely obliterate the French victory over Croatia at the World Cup final today: that time when the uber fantastic Real Gothic beat Stokoemotiv at Whitby’s very own Turnbull Ground. Pelé would have been proud.

The April 2018 edition of Whitby Goth Weekend ended on a high note with a surprise victory for us all. True, Real Gothic have always managed to be the most stylish team. If the competition were about who has got the acest eyeliner skills or the best taste in music, Real Gothic would always come on top, no doubt. However, football-wise, they have been historically a little less lucky than the local team at the iconic match we all know as “El Gothico.”

As usual, we had a lovely atmosphere, plenty of drink (Wolfy and I had tea exclusively, of course), and our two favourite commentators: Al Fiendish and Wesley Mallin, who at some point during the second half, left the microphone and heroically joined our dark knights in the pitch.

Double Dare

Stokoemotiv scored the first goal within the first five minutes of the match. Real Gothic’s winger, Richard Dove, “Dove will tear you apart”, flew like the wind and had a couple of good shots but Rick Davies, Stokoemotiv’s goalie did a fine job, stopping our boys’ awesome goal attempts. Stokoemotiv’s Mike Thomas proved to be dangerous and energetic, what’s more. Near the end of the first half, there was a mighty shot at goal from Real Gothic’s Robbie White. Alas, it was not meant to be.

She’s in parties

At half time, the girls entered the pitch. Our Sisters of Real, lead by Louise Street and Donna “Jez” Valenzano had their traditional penalty shootout against the Stokoemotiv WAGs, who won 3 to 0. Both sides were fantastic, regardless. It was all for charity and good entertainment. If you would like to know what the bar looks like at half time, take a look at this video of Wolfy from a previous footie edition. A bit of a flashback to prepare you for April’s highlights.

In the flat field

The second half was a true game changer, pun intended. From the very first seconds, Real Gothic scored a goal. Our players increased their speed and might. Maybe the snakebite and black potion was finally working its magic. Speaking of magic potions, Mr. Fiendish, our star commentator was handed a pint of beer, which was passed from one member of the audience to the next, until it reached its rightful owner. Talk about team work! On and off the pitch!

Dark entries

Four minutes later, Stokoemotiv scored a goal but our boys got even a couple of minutes afterwards. The match was now packed with action and an impressive display from the forces of darkness and impeccable backcombed hair.

Real Gothic scored two more goals, on the seventeenth and thirty third minute respectively. Incidentally, the player who scored the last goal also scored the first one. We’re talking about the mysterious Robbie White, who wore the t-shirt number 28. Our friend, Bob Slassor, let us use this photographic sequence he took of the last Real Gothic goal. Thanks a lot, Bob. You’re a (goth) star!

And just as Al cried out: “We’re now winning 4 – 2!”, we all got extremely excited, which is a bit of a faux pas if you’re a goth, but this time round it shall be forgivable. Just look at Wolfy, who bumped into Lee and a gorgeous lady. Yes, goths can be happy, too. Just look at us!

Nevertheless, this wasn’t the end, even though Wolfy did not seem to notice and cried victory a bit too soon, just like the boy who cried wolf, or was it the other way around? There were a few minutes left and near the end, Stokoemotiv scored another goal. The final score was thus 4 – 3.

Both teams did splendidly and what’s more important, they raised money for charity. This time Real and Stokoemotiv offered £300 to WHISH (Whitby Hidden Impairments Support & Help), a charity that does a marvellous job, helping people with hidden impairments, as well as their families.

Hair of the Wolf

When the match came to its end, we all got to celebrate properly. It was the perfect ending to a week full of goth music, dance, dark elegance and drinkies. I got to talk to my friend Graham Best, who was just as shocked as I was. By the way, Graham and his wife, Sue, are the proud parents of Klaus Best, Real Gothic’s goalie extraordinaire.

All in all, it was another fantastic Whitby holiday. Obviously, Wolfy and I ran to the tea rooms to celebrate with copious amounts of tea and cakes. Many thanks to our Real FC team for their extraordinary performance: Klaus Best, AJ Sikesy, Gareth Wright, Trevor A. Broadbank, Ted Govostis, Terry Cummins, James Patrick, Rio Goldhammer, James Shoobridge, Carl Noble, Joel Heyes, Mark Chisman, Adam Williams, Timothy Payne, Mason Von, Richard Dove, Robbie White and Wesley Mallin.

Also, special thanks to Bob Slassor, Nigel Spowage and Richard Dove for helping us with this blog entry. An extra thanks to Shaggy, too for taking us to the match.

Bites and howls,

Clovis and Wolfy

P.S. If you have a few minutes to spare, visit the charities that Real Gothic FC and Stokoemotiv Whitby FC have supported recently.

WHISH: http://www.whishgroup.co.uk/

Willow Foundation: https://www.willowfoundation.org.uk/

SOS Children’s Villages UK: https://www.soschildrensvillages.org.uk/

Dark Wolf: an untamed artist

We met Dark at Whitby Goth Weekend’s Bizarre Bazaar last April. He was a most splendid chap who graciously agreed to have a nice chat with us even though his stall got really busy. We talked about his fantastic work and his love for wolves. Wolfy was chuffed to meet a human with a very lupine perspective.

Dark Wolf is incredibly talented but also very approachable, down-to-earth and generous. Every single penny he makes from selling his artwork goes to charity, in order to help our wolf brothers and sisters. The UK Wolf Conservation Trust had been Dark’s charity of choice from the start, and last year they received £500 from him. Unfortunately, they will be closing to the public this August. Still, Dark’s generosity has no bounds. He will keep giving his earnings to other wolf and wildlife charities.

Dark’s spirit animal is most definitely the wolf. He has the wolf’s energy and vision, which is why he and Wolfy had this wonderful connection. He even wore a wolf mask in this picture. Wolfy is now a fan!

Dark Wolf 2

We got these wicked illustrations of wolves. The one on the left is called “Emberwolf II”, and the one on the right, “Strength, Past & Future.”

Do take a look at his work, you won’t regret it. Follow Dark on

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/darkwolfartwork

Twitter: @darkwolfartwork.

Or visit his website: http://www.darkwolfartwork.com